Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Ode to Kidney Stones

Oh Kidney Stones, how you do adore me.
How you dance and wriggle hoping to make me giggle.

Instead you make me cry.

Why you ask?

Your attempts at merriment, I must confess, are way off the mark.

While you revel in your time with me, as I writhe in pain on the couch,
it seems there would be another who is competing for my time.

While you jab and jostle me, to earn love from me, a box of fishy crackers has found it's home on the floor.

Some are crushed, other's are thrown, while some are being eaten by my love.

His name is Henry.

He may not have your talent for positioning yourself gleefully where I pee, but his talents of decorating a la Pepperidge Farm surpass the hold you have on me.

And while you've encased me in layers of agony, he will forever know the true way to capture my heart and earn his place on the couch next to me.

For there is nothing as noticeable, my calcified friend, as crackers stuck to your feet.

And while you may resist my desire to flush you out, to surround myself with better friends,

you must know that no matter what, you will come out in the end!!


  1. Ha ha ha ha you finally came over to the other side! Henry is such a mix of Kate and Charlie!!!! I can't believe how big he is! And that's fun for you to have kidney stones! I miss you like crazy...the message you left on my phone made me cry...just reminded me how much I love you and am so lucky to have you as my best friend FOREVER!!!!!!!

  2. Oh I am soo sorry. Nothing like an infant, six kids AND a kidney stone. Hang in there! (imagine cat poster from scholastic news here, hanging in a tree by one paw - haha) Love you. Glad you enjoyed the dating post, ah, Hairy Chest Man. Hubba hubba...or not. Woof.

  3. Oh you poor thing! I love your "Ode"! I have only been lucky enough to have them 1 time-and once is enough for me. I hope these don't plague you all time!!!


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