Moonface boy

Henry has a really round face, and his eyebrows are very light. Which gives his whole face a moonlike appearance. And I love him for it.

You totally see it now too, huh? Sometimes I call him Moony.

Poor kid. S'gonna need therapy.

A day of total bliss

I have no pictures of my day yesterday.

For once, it didn't seem important to photograph anything. But for sure, the day is etched in my memories and that of my children's, hopefully, forever. Even without pictures.

Yesterday was supposed to be a vacation day. But because of all the snow in December it ended up being a make up snow day for school.

That's fine. For everybody else.

It was still a vacation day at our house.

We started the day by sleeping in until 9. Rolling out of bed just to relocate on the couch watching Pokemon, snuggled up with blankets.

Around 10, breakfast.

We worked for a little bit. We all cleaned everyone's rooms. Taking turns all helping eachother, it only took half an hour to clean 3 bedrooms.

Lunch consisted of pizza, popcorn and soda. And the best part? We all sat down and ate it together.

We then proceeded to the most challenging part of the day-deciding what movies to watch. When 6 people all have different opinions about what constitutes a movie worth watching, it can get quite loud.

Our movie list ended up being:
the live action Peter Pan
Spirit-Stallion of the Cimmaron
the video of Julia's play
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

We also played a board game that Julia made up. Such creative children I have.
Intermingled with all of this was candy eating, snickerdoodle making and soda guzzling. Not much burping though. Wrestling with Charlie, slobbering Nora with kisses, Henry falling asleep on the couch, kids taking turns sitting on my lap and lots and lots of giggling(a lot of that by me) and smiling, a ton of hugging and many happy sighs.

At the end of the day dad brought them home chicken nuggets (which is quite a treat now that we NEVER go out to eat, and I mean never.)
And I cut everyone's hair in the kitchen.

I was literally in Heaven to have all 6 of my kids to myself yesterday. Of course everyone wanted to repeat today. But I have to be the responsible parent SOMETIMES.

So they're at school. School stinks. A lot. Except for the part where they learn. That parts ok. But that's all. Nothing else. Except for recess. They like recess. Oh and their friends, and pizza day. But that's really all.

*sigh*

More conversations with THIS guy

This is a special Instant Message edition.

I think we're funnier than we probably are.

Oh well. Enjoy.






Amy says:
did you read my post yet?

Jeff Allen says:
yeah, sorry I had to run to a meeting right then.

Amy says:
I'm so sure

Jeff Allen says:
I read it

Jeff Allen says:
it was funny

Amy says:
like gives you a smile funny, or laugh funny, be honest

Jeff Allen says:
laugh funny.

Amy says:
honest?

Jeff Allen says:
honest.

Amy says:
thank you

Amy says:
Maile?

Jeff Allen says:
No, I'm jeff.

Amy says:
yeah, I know

Amy says:
I included maile in the IM

Jeff Allen says:
ok.

Amy says:
so don't say anything embarassing

Jeff Allen says:
LOL

Jeff Allen says:
right.

Amy says:
thanks

Jeff Allen says:
like I ever do that.

Jeff Allen says:
over IM.

Amy says:
true

Amy says:
totally out of character for either of us

Jeff Allen says:
totally

Amy says:
alright, she's not there, punk

Jeff Allen says:
punk, is right.

Amy says:
Kate is home from school now

Jeff Allen says:
what?

Jeff Allen says:
is it cuz she didn't eat breakfast?

Amy says:
the nurse called, she has a fever, cold, the chills, Henry and Nora stuff

Amy says:
Julia forgot her paper too

Jeff Allen says:
oh. ok. her permission slip?

Amy says:
yes

Jeff Allen says:
that's funny.

Amy says: why?

Jeff Allen says:
I don't know, they were working on them right up to the moment we left.

Jeff Allen says:
that's like me leaving my lunch on the counter.

Amy says:
yeah, not so funny for me. I have to run it to the school now

Jeff Allen says:
that's funny too

Amy says:
talk to you later

Jeff Allen says:
ha ha ha

Amy says:
bye

Jeff Allen says:
wait

Jeff Allen says:
I was j/k

Amy says:
wHATever

Jeff Allen says:
is that a secret message about a HAT?

Amy says:
no, it was supposed to look more like this:WHATever

Jeff Allen says:
oh,

Amy says:
your sassy today

Jeff Allen says:
see how I'm like " a Beatiful mind"

Jeff Allen says:
I see patterns and tricks that others don't see.

Amy says:
I love a beatiful mind

Amy says:
spell much?

Jeff Allen says:
much

Amy says:
like I said, sassy

Jeff Allen says:
oh, I spelled beautiful wrong.

Jeff Allen says:
I get it.

Amy says:
yes

Jeff Allen says:
classic.

Amy says:
alright, I have to go take care of our oldest child

Jeff Allen says:
ok. tell her to feel better.

Amy says:
and change henrys poopy diaper

Amy says:
my job is soo glamourous

Jeff Allen says:
yes it is
Jeff Allen says:
you never replied to the mba group did you?

Amy says:
no

Amy says:
why would I?

Amy says:
I don't know any of them

Jeff Allen says:
ok, cool so we don't have to go tonight then.

Amy says:
did you want to?

Jeff Allen says:
no

Amy says:
good, me neither

Jeff Allen says:
good

Amy says:
I just wanna hang with my peeps

Jeff Allen says:
yo, thas right

Jeff Allen says:
go wipe some poop, ok.

Amy says:
I love poop

Amy says:
and I love wiping it

Jeff Allen says:
oh, yeah.

Amy says:
love you punko

Jeff Allen says:
you too

Amy says:
bye

Jeff Allen says:
bye


And just so you know, Henry's diaper was AWESOME! I imagine it smelled like a garbage truck unloaded it's contents in my house.

Like I said, glamourous.

Sometimes, I lie

I consider myself an honest person.

I stop at stop signs, I obey the laws of the land, if I accidentally leave a store with some unknown object (what mother has not had this happen and only realized it once you get out to the car?)then I truck back in to return or pay for it.

But sometimes in the interest of time constraints or the possible embarassment of another person, I have been known to lie.

Example: When I was a freshman at BYU I work at the Ernest L. Wilkinson Cafeteria, the ELWC for those on the down low. What? The down low? I don't know who I am sometimes.

Anywaaay, I worked in the service line, usually cutting meat. A lot of people came thru during education week and since we are all Mormon, everyone is nice and chatty and wants to know where you're from for some reason.

Well, as I'm serving up a slice of roast beef to a gentleman who oddly looks like John Malkovich, he asks me "so where you from?".

I answer brightly, as the dutiful employee I am, "Oh, I'm from Washington" (imagine annoying perky smile, too much teeth)

"Oh" he says, "Do you grow apples there?"

And thinking he means Washington in general I answer proudly "Why yes we do!"

So imagine the instant awkward-ness I feel when he says "oh yeah? How many acres do you have?"

What?! Oh cr*p. He's halfway down the line, still talking to me, and I don't want to take the time to inform him of the misunderstanding. So I answer:

"Ten acres?"

At the time I'm not even sure if that sounds like a legitimate amount, and probably he had no idea either, so he just smiled and said "that's great, well, have a great day!"

"thanks" I reply.

I'm totally going to heck, I just lied at BYU.

Example #2: One of the times Jeff and I lived in Provo, Maile and her family came and stayed with us for a day or two.

At that time her family consisted of Maile and her husband Scott and their 5 month old daughter, Megan.

We all went to Target for some reason, (back when we only had 3 kids between the two of us and that was still possible) and Maile decided to try on some clothes as Jeff and Scott wandered in another part of the store.

So I was given the happy assignment of holding Megan while we waited for Maile.

Now just so you know, Megan is now a gorgeous 10 year old, and she was a beautiful baby as well. But for some reason that day Maile had her dressed from head to toe in denim.

And as we all know, 5 month old babies can look male or female depending on what you dress them in. And denim is a sure wringer to convince people your baby is a boy.

Where was I? Oh, yeah.

So I'm standing there holding Megan when this woman, who is waiting for someone says, "how old is he?"

Immediately she has it wrong, and she has asked the question in a way that I would have to correct her from the get go, which as a 26 year old young mother, I seemed incapable of doing.

So figuring that I could answer and then never see her again, I answered "5 months". Careful, you may notice, to not call her a him as to not perpetuate this little lie.

But the woman decides to keep talking to me about "him".

For crying out loud, what's a person to do?

So she oohs and aahs, "oh he so cute, he's so this, blah, blah, blah".

And then comes the worst part, after standing there letting this woman think Megan is a boy for the last 3 minutes, she asks the dreaded question.

"What's his name?"

Uhhh, what?, shoot, now she'll know I'm a big fat liar.

So I did what anyone would do, I answered, "Joseph."

Yes, now I'm for sure going to heck.

"Oh Joseph, what a cute name, blah, blah, blah"

At this moment, Maile exits the dressing room, and realizing that there is still potential to be caught in this lie once Maile looks confused at her daughter being called Joseph I quickly go to her, handing her Megan, and whisper frantically in her ear,

"Megan's a 5 month old boy named Joseph!"

My fabulous sister plays along, not having any clue why I have apparently lost my mind.

She accepts the final compliments from this poor woman and we make a quick departure.

For a while after that, Maile and Scott would call Megan stinky Joe, a tribute to my comical stupidity. Sheesh.

I could probably go on with many more examples because this seems to happen to me a lot.

Mostly with strangers. I am too lazy to correct people when I figure I will never see them again.

I found though, that you can lie without speaking. That being a 35 year old mother of 6 has not enabled me with the ability to handle things maturely 100 percent of the time.

Case in point. Yesterday I was in the school office to check Anne Marie and Charlie out of school.

While standing at the counter waiting my turn to talk to the office people, I noticed a small stack of packets/permission slips for the upcoming school play.

Knowing that at least two of my children wanted to try out, I thought,"I'll grab 4 just in case everyone wants to try out and then I don't have to trek back in here." It wasn't my fault that there were only 4 left, so I took them all.

So I have my packets, I've told the office people that I need Charlie and Anne Marie, and I'm standing there waiting for the kiddos when I hear someone ask:

"Can I get one of the permission slips for the play?"

Shoot, double shoot, what do I do? I already know I've taken the last 4, and I need them all, they probably have more somewhere, right?

So I'm standing there attempting to look non-chalant as the Principal and the grumpy office assistant (who always scares me cuz she looks like she's going to yell at you for checking your child out of school) are searching everywhere saying "there was a big stack right here! Where did they go?"

At this point I'm pretty sure my guilty face is going to give me away, and yet I cannot summon the ability to say "Oh, I took the last of them", cuz what if grumpy face girl yells at me?

My only hope was to wait for Charlie and Anne Marie out in the hallway, cuz it was only a matter of time before I was found out.

Carefully hiding the papers behind me, I backed out of the office (like THAT wouldn't draw anyone's attention) and then did a quick spin so the papers were in front of me (I could be a secret agent), walked into the hallway out of sight of the office, rolled the papers up and hid them in my coat.

When I saw Charlie and Anne Marie I said "Come one, lets go, quickly!"

I was having day-mares of grumpy face chasing me down the hall yelling, "Hey! We know what you diiiiddd!" (imagine scary voice)>
Did I happen to mention I'm a 35 year old mother of 6?

Seems they'll let anyone have kids these days.

Totally

Homemade Bread



Totally yummy, in case you were wondering.

Totally a Southbeach-diet buster.

Totally worth it.

Smugness, Henry, and the "great idea"

You all know Henry.


Sometimes referred to as Henri(pronounced with a cajun accent), Hank-by his Granger-boy cousins, or Bubby-my oh so silly affectionate name for him.

Henry is a boy, as you know. Which means he finds new things to do every day.

One fine day when it was actually sunny here, Kate and I made bread.

It was fortunate I had Kate helping me cuz well, I hate kneading bread.

So while I conveniently nursed Nora on the couch, Kate kneaded the bread with her ever lengthening limbs and long fingers.

Being caught up in attempts to streamline my life a little, I just started the rice for dinner before sitting down with Nora.

How does that help streamline my life, you may ask?

Well...I usually forget the rice til it is too late to have it ready for dinner. Something about starting it 45 minutes earlier than the rest of dinner throws me off.

So on this day, I started it at 3:30, then it could stay warm and it would be done already.

Pat pat on my back.

So I'm nursing Nora, Kate is kneading, and Henry discovers the container of open rice.


I hear "Nooooo Henry!" coming from Kate.

Somewhere in the process of trying to pick up the container, he actually dumped half of it out on the floor.

Then proceeds to dance a jig in it and swish it from side to side with his dimpled little hands.

So I think to myself, no problem, not a big deal.

I put Nora down, happily sucking her fingers while a fresh stream of drool and milk flow down her chin, and proceed to the kitchen to clean up the mess.

That's when it hit me, my GREAT idea.

It's brilliant, I'm so smart, look at me, their going to give me mom of the year!

Why don't I sweep up all the rice and put it in bowls for Henry to play with?

It's pure genius!

He can have his little fix of playing with things he shouldn't and I won't feel like the rice was wasted.

Side note-it's not that the rice is bad cuz it touched the floor, its that it's IMPOSSIBLE to sweep up rice without sweeping up everything else that may be on your floor, and who wants to find odds bits of unidentifiable stuff while you're eating your rice? Eeww.

So I go for it, all systems go, full steam ahead, ready at will!


And what do you know?

He loves it of course!

He's in 2 year old Heaven. Happily scooping the rice back and forth from bowl to bowl.

He spills a few grains of rice, but no big deal, right? I already cleaned up Rice Mountain, a few grains will be easy after that.

But soon, as all good things do, this comes to an end.

And Henry realizes there are waaay funner things to do with the rice than just scooping it from bowls.

Smug patting of my own back? Gone.

Remember to have him go outside with the rice next time? Got it.

Yesterday I baked bread, took my kids to the park, tidied up the house, made dinner, made dessert for family home evening and blogged.

Am I bragging?

A little.

But mostly I'm amazed at how much a person can get done in one day if all the forces are working FOR you rather than against you.

Today feels productive as well, yet busy to the point where this will be all the blog for today.

Sorry.

But be watching for tomorrow.

I will have a tale of smugness, Henry and my "great idea".

More conversations

Bedtime is full of opportunities to learn about your kids.

And to sometimes learn about ourselves.

Last night provided me with both opportunities.

Sometimes around our house, bedtime is less than organized and rarely goes without a hitch.

Last night was no exception.

We have gotten into a bad habit of occasionally letting ourselves think that Charlie and Anne Marie don't actually have to be "put to bed".

Kate and Julia have mastered the going to bed by themselves, but everyone else still requires stories, songs and some cuddling.

Last night evolved into a "please just go to bed!" night.

Lots of getting out of bed to tell us one more thing, some crying, searching for last minutes toys to sleep with, and the sounds of light sabers smashing together in Charlie's room.

As I lay in bed exhausted, I heard something. Something small and still and very quiet. It was whispering and it said:

"Go lay down with Anne Marie, she is only 5, and when she is older she will need to remember that you did this for her. Go be with your daughter and comfort her."

So I decided to listen to that voice and I got up out of my toasty bed and wandered down the hall to check on her.

I walked in her room and I was greeted with the biggest smile. And our conversation went something like this:

Anne Marie: "Wishing on stars does work!" (She has glow in the dark stars on her ceiling)

Mom:"What do you mean?"

AM:"I wished on a star that you would come be with me, and you came!"

AM:"Did you hear me crying?"

Mom:"No, but Heavenly Father did, and he told me to come be with you"

Quiet snuggling.

AM:"Mom?"

Mom:"Yes Anne Marie?"

AM:"I can suck my other thumb since I have a band aid on this one."

Mom:"Maybe you should think about not sucking it anymore."

AM:"Sometimes I suck it at school."

Mom:"You know,it's not good for your teeth to suck your thumb."

AM:"Why is it not good for your teeth?"

Mom:"It can change their shape."

AM:"You mean they won't be square anymore?"

Mom, stifling a giggle:"No, it changes where your teeth are at."

AM:"You mean these will be on the top and the top will be on the bottom?"

*sigh*

Mom, trying another approach:"You'll have to get braces."

AM:"What?!But then I won't be able to eat pizza!"

Mom:"Or popcorn, or gum or soda"

AM:"I can have soda if I use a straw,but I want to eat popcorn and gum."

AM:"I'll TRY not to suck my thumb."

Mom:"That would be great."

AM:Already sucking her thumb.

Mom:"Good night, I love you."

AM:"I love you too."

Ha Ha Ha

My friend Becky sent this to me. Cracks me up, just wanted to share.(If you click on the picture it will bring it up bigger so you can actually read it)

I did it, sort of.

Alright, so yesterday was an exercise in restraint.

Sad that I'm talking about staying off of my computer rather than something monumental like not raiding the pantry for something sweet at 10 o'clock at night.

All day went something like this:

Feed the kids, don't check the computer.

Do the dishes, stay off of the computer.

Fold some laundry, DO NOT wander downstairs towards the computer.

Nurse Nora, AVOID languishing in the computer chair, checking your email while you feed her.

Eat lunch, don't even look in the direction of the computer.

Put the little ones down for a nap, please try to not even think about the computer?

Ok Amy, you're starting to feel desperate, repeat over and over to yourself- "I don't need to know about Brangelina, or Google anything or find out updates on Facebook or IM my husband every 10 minutes"

I succeeded for the most part. I had to pull up an old email last night for my art docent lesson today so I "checked" a few things and was off in less than 10 minutes.

All in all I feel it was a successful experiment.

I didn't get that much more done around my house, but I spent waaaay more time with my kids. Which was both wonderful and embarassing to realize that the computer takes me away so much.

Sooo, I will be attempting it again today.

I will be busy anyway, afterall it IS my birthday, you know.

To hear more about me, go here.

Big ol' time waster

That's what I am. A time waster.

I have all this time and I do way too much wasting of it.

I find that the computer is sucking my will to do anything productive.

So, I am proclaiming to anyone who actually reads this blog..."Today I am not going to look at my computer" (after this post, of course)

It's an experiment in will power, time management and employing my self with worthwhile projects.

Hey! Did I just hear a sarcastic "good luck" somewhere in the back row?

That's fine. It's understandable that this endeavor would be met with skepticism when hours of blog trolling occur everyday in this house.

But today can be different. Will be different. Must be different.

Mostly cuz I had approximately 4 hours of sleep last night thanks to some fabulous friends. So because I wiled away the hours last night, I feel I must make up for that by making my house sparkly this morning and then napping in the afternoon.

So, if you need me, then my phone works.

You know, that old fashioned thing that no one uses that much anymore because they can send off an impersonal email instead? (I'm sooo guilty of this. Doesn't mean I love you, just means I'm lazy)

So again, IF you need me, I will not be hovering around my computer slapping my own hand everytime it tries to log into my yahoo.mail on it's own.

I will not be biting my nails wondering if anyone left a comment on my little blog or checking to see how many page loads there were today.

And I FOR SURE will not investigate anything on Google that just cannot wait until tomorrow.

I'm serious.

Really.

I mean it!

*Sigh*

I'm having withdrawals even talking about it.

Does this mean I'm addicted, or just trying to add to my treasure trove of useless trivia and random facts?

Either way, pathetic.

So wish me luck. I'm a social experiment. Can I really live without the super information highway for one day?

Check back tomorrow to find out.

Hey buddy, can you spare some time?

My darling baby is 5 1/2 months old.

What do you really accomplish in that time, being a baby and all?

Well, you certainly accomplish wiggling your way into the heart of every family member.

You poop and eat and sleep pretty efficiently.

You smile and coo and giggle and possibly, maybe, even roll over.

You may begin to teeter ever so precariously as you learn how to balance on that round rump of yours, you know, sitting up.

You may even eat solids and cry when mom leaves the room.

Families produce different types of accomplishments in their progeny.

My sister's kids all get their teeth at like 4 months or something crazy like that.

One friend's children have walked around the 15 month mark. While I've heard of children who walked at 8 months.

So you see, there is a wide range of normal.

However, for my family, teeth do not show up on my little round bottomed,gummy babies until around 9 months.

This has been the bar that has been set and not one child of mine has dared to raise (or lower, whichever you choose) that bar.

Until now.

Last night as I allowed Nora to gnaw on my finger, I discovered something extraordinary.

My sweet, little, tiny 5 month old, my last baby, is sprouting a tooth.

Oh, the humanity!! (Isn't that something people say when they are in despair?)

This, you see, is not allowed.

Only 2 days ago I was quietly contemplating how fortunate I was to have children who don't get teeth til they are 9 months old.

First of all, it makes nursing much nicer.

But secondly, and equally as important, they maintain a lovely, drooly, toothless grin thereby retaining a newborn appearance, to me anyway.

But, really, I should have known that something was up with this child of mine.

Not only is she my only child to get teeth before 8 months or so, she also rolled over the earliest (3 1/2 months)is sitting up at 5 1/2 months and has started pushing herself up onto her arms. Of course that means that crawling is next.



Now I realize this is not in the amazing category for many mothers.

But we are average to slightly late bloomers in this house.

With the exception of Julia (she was a little early at everything as well and walked at 10 months), every one got teeth, rolled over, crawled and walked at around the same pace.

Perhaps if Nora was any of my other children I would exclaim that she is so advanced and will probably be an amazing athlete, or something.

But seeing as how she is my last child, I have foolishly held on to wanting the time to go slowly.

So tonight, when I felt that new little tooth, I did what any other mother in my position might do.

I bawled my eyes out.

I moaned that it was too soon, that it was going by too fast, that I couldn't stand that I was not going to have anymore babies and how dare she do anything earlier than I anticipated?

Then I did, again, what any mother in my position might do, and I promptly attempted to get a picture of the little budder.

As I wrestled with my tiny snuggler, attempting to time the pushing of the camera button exactly as her tongue went back into her mouth, I realized something.

I am no more in control of how fast I want life to go by then I am of that little tongue darting in and out of those perfectly formed little lips.



So does that mean I've accepted my fate of mother to a baby who is boldly going where no Allen baby has gone before?

Perhaps.

Because somewhere between intermittent crying and exhilaration at her strength and, uh, early-ness, I know that I chose this life, with all the happiness, joy and bloomers, both early and late.

Yes, I will cry when she crawls and walks and talks and goes to kindergarten, just like I did with everyone else.

But they won't all be sad tears, no.

Because I get to be here for part of their journey on earth, and what a beautifully bumpy little ride it is.

I'm a Goonie

"Don't you realize? The next time you see sky, it'll be over another town. The next time you take a test, it'll be in some other school. Our parents, they want the best of stuff for us. But right now, they got to do what's right for them. Because it's their time. Their time! Up there! Down here, it's our time. It's our time down here. That's all over the second we ride up Troy's bucket. "

I used to think that my brother and sister and I were the only ones who truly knew and loved the Goonies. Hey, I was 12,what did I know? We watched it over 50 times probably, and could quote along with it word for word.

Simply because I grew up in such a small little town, I felt a connection with Mikey, Mouth, Chunk and Data. Why? Because it felt like there was nothing ever to do except what your imagination provided. I imagined great adventures where I found a secret treasure. Not adventures like Brand and Andy. Kissing wasn't a totally awful concept, but it would be another 4 years before I would kiss a boy, so the boy/girl relationships bored me. But the adventure of Goonies called to me. It whispered in my ear that I wanted to do great things. That I wanted to discover something lost and mysterious with my brother and sister and a few friends in tow.

And yet, I never did anything daring, or adventurous, or discover-ing. I've only been to Canada. I've never sailed the ocean or tramped thru a jungle. I have not hunted lions or delivered aid in Africa or even bungee jumped.

But I do not regret my life

Because....in no particular order....I got married at 22.

Had my first child a year and 3 months later.

Then had my second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth children.

I moved around the country, waded (I don't swim) in the Atlantic Ocean, and saw the Statue of Liberty with my sister.

I sang with the Providence singers, went to college, broke my collarbone, and climbed unknowingly into a mountain lion's cave.

I have served others, made others laugh, and given love when it was most needed.

Those are some of the highlights of my life. Nothing exciting, nothing worthy of an unofficial tell all type biography.

But it is my time, my time down here. And I will never ride up Troy's bucket. That is for sure.

Healing Waters

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Call her. Seriously, you'll be glad you did.

Dawn
Healing Waters Skincare
(253) 857-6113

5:15 p.m.

Thoughts at 5:15 pm last night.

"ok, Jeff and Charlie will be back from basketball practice in 45 minutes. So. I need to have dinner ready and the house tidy so that they can eat."

"And then Jeff has to leave pretty quickly for Scouts and then he will be back at 8 o'clock and we can have ice cream sundaes for his birthday."

" Oh, yeah, I have to chop the cookies and the peanut butter cups up."

5:16 pm "What is that noise? Oh, it's Nora."

"She wants to eat or be held or something. Well, I really need to finish chopping the veggies for the sweet and sour meatballs. I wonder if I can hold her off from eating until I get the vegetables in the pot? How the heck am I supposed to chop vegetables while I hold her? That won't work. I'll just put her down."

" Whoa! Ok, nevermind, please don't cry,I'll hold you."

5:17 pm




<

Happy, Happy Birthday Jeffy Dear

Jeff-

Nighttime is some of my favorite time with you.

Not just because of what you're thinking (wink, wink).

Because we talk.

And laugh.

And share both our hearts desires and sorrows.

Because we can pray together.

Eat treats together.

And make eachother's hearts soar.

Like when I said that I didn't know if you had struggled with curiosity or jealousy.

And you said that after that one question, you never gave it another thought.

And my heart soared upon hearing that.

It confirmed what I knew, that you love me.

And not just as a man loves his wife (which is great, believe you me.)

You love me enough to see my potential, to forgive and forget, and to believe more in me than I do in myself.

I am more confident with your love.

I am more capable with your arms around me.

I shine brighter when I stand next to you.

I am better when I am loving you.

Knowing all this, I had the necklace made.

I'm proud to wear it, I love it in all it's sappy-ness.

And it lets you know that you are, and will always be....



Happy Birthday my Love!

My father

Digby Granger's children and their spouses have been after him for years to write for us. He is a wonderful story teller and gifted writer. I am soooo happy to announce that my father has joined the blogging world. You will see through his eyes, that no matter where we are in our lives, we need the love of our parents, and if we're lucky, the happy memories will be the most vivid of all. Number 3 wireless was the address of one of the places he lived growing up in Winnipeg, Manitoba, CANADA. And his blog is now on my blog list. Please enjoy and leave comments for him, he would love to know his "voice" is being heard.

Amy

Sing to me Mommy

Anne Marie inspired songs out of me when she was little.

I would just look at her while putting her to bed and come up with a lullaby.

I'm not saying they were award winning, but still.

She asks me to sing Baby True to her even now.

She will always be my Baby True, as will they all.

IM-ing my Dreams

Amy says:
I love you
Jeff Allen says:
I love you, too
Amy says:
I had a really interesting dream
Amy says:
last night
Amy says:
I dreamt you were at work
Amy says:
and I was standing outside our house
Amy says:
when all these military planes started flying overhead
Amy says:
suddenly, a huge missile flew into the house across the street, blowing it to smithereens
Amy says:
all the kids were outside and I just knew thta something bad was happening, it wasn't just a freak accident
Amy says:
then, looking down the street, I saw all these men with machine guns, gunning people down
Amy says:
I yelled for the kids to get inside. Nora was older and was banging on the door to be let in. I grabbed her, went inside and we locked the doors
Amy says:
but I knew it wouldn't keep them out
Amy says:
I didn't have a gun to protect us
Amy says:
and I just kept thinking, if Jeff were here it would be ok
Amy says:
I couldn't call you, for whatever dream reason, but I knew that if we were together it would be ok
Amy says:
I had two more dreams as well
Amy says:
last night
Jeff Allen says:
wow that is intense
Amy says:
The world had erupted in war, everywhere
Amy says:
the only safe place was an island that you had to ferry to, there was no bridge
Amy says:
we would have to grow our own food and build shelter, because we had nothing left
Amy says:
but we would be safe from what was going on in the outside world
Amy says:
as long as we were together
Amy says:
The last dream was a huge accident involving a semi and an ambulance
Amy says:
nobody was killed, but it blocked up traffic for a long time
Amy says:
I was there, helping and calming the people who were involved.
Amy says:
I realized as I was in rescue mode, that I had completely forgotten the lines of cars waiting and watching. I was just doing the right thing, not concerned with what the world thought
Amy says:
this was all last night
Jeff Allen says:
wow
Amy says:
I know, it's all really vivid in my head still
Amy says:
I'm not sure if it was my fears coming to fruition in my dreams, or if the dreams were sent to help me realize that everything will be alright if we do whats right and are together
Jeff Allen says:
I hope so.
Jeff Allen says:
that all will be alright.
Amy says:
me too

Brighter Days

So much growth can come from painful experiences.

I felt the growing pains of poor decisions as a young adult.

The resultant growth is that I am better at spotting trouble a million miles away.

And I do my darndest to stay away from that trouble.

Sometimes the pain is sharp and quick.

Other times it's dull and constant.

Always I find myself a little confused that I'm once again going thru a painful trial.

I mean, how many times does it take for a person to learn enough?

To not repeat history?

God has told us that He will not send us a trial too big for us to overcome.

But that doesn't mean we will overcome it. It just means it IS over-come-able.

I want to be one who overcomes.

One who stares at adversity and says "HA! You thought you had me, but you were WRONG because I'm stronger than you realized!"

But what if, just what if, part of enduring the trial is actually failing at what you're doing?

Does conquering life's challenges mean that everything works out the way we want it to?

Of course not.

Sometimes the happy ending starts when we realize that we aren't in control, that Heavenly Father has a plan for us that may not always feel perfect, but that truly is just that. Perfect.

So can I stop complaining long enough about the things that are difficult, and take a step back in order to see what I can learn?

Do I have enough faith in that perfect plan to let it mold me into who I really am, rather than the flawed worldly perfect I think I want to be?

And who am I?

I am hopeful.

I don't enjoy the pain. I don't relish the hollow ache in my heart that from time to time threatens to overwhelm me.

But I'm grateful for it.

Because I know that a loving Father in Heaven still thinks I'm worth while enough to continue to challenge me and help me grow. He hasn't forgotten me.

So I know that I am loved.

Because I still see the blessings thru the trials. I still have hope in my heart for better days. And I still have faith and trust in a perfect plan provided for an imperfect me.

There are always brighter days ahead. Bright enough to blind me with the joy that awaits.

There is always hope. Hope that when those brighter days come, I will have the wisdom to let them shine upon me. And Remember. Remember. Remember.

I will remember, and that will light my way the next time I find myself in the dark.

Here's to the brighter days ahead.

Happy 2009.