Friday, April 15, 2011

Normal, or not?

Things I think are normal. Charlie's third grade concert that finishes out their unit on Africa. . Charlie's awesome teacher and the fun hat and tye dyed shirts they made. Getting treats after every function they have. . And then, there is this. An invitation Charlie received. Take a good look folks. That is an invitation to a sleep over. It looks like a lot of fun and that it's been planned out very well. There is just one problem. It's from a girl.

And now...a rant.

Are we seriously in a place as a society that people think this is normal? That boys and girls having co-ed sleepover parties is considered acceptable? I'd heard of this for junior high and high school age, and I thought those parents were off their rocker.

I can see how possibly a parent would think third graders are young and innocent and that there is no harm from this. But my goal as a parent is not to teach them that co-ed sleeping is ok.

You all remember the things you started learning at 9 years old? Well I do, and thank you very much but combining that with sleepovers just isn't on my list of good solid parenting.

Charlie is disappointed that he can't go. He asked if he could at least go and just stay late. But I just can't bring myself to trust the judgement of these parents enough to let my son go over there and stay late with a bunch of other kids.

Maybe it seems too harsh, too prudish. But my job is not to validate other parents. My job is to teach my son. And in our house, you don't have co-ed sleepovers unless you're related to them.

But what I want to know is if this is becoming the new norm? Has anyone else encou
ntered this?


  1. I think your right on. Co-ed sleep overs should not be for kids of any age. A good friend of mine has two boys in high school and on in elementary. One of the boys has a girlfriend. She, the girlfriend, lives about a half hour or so away. So, sometimes my friend, the mom, will let her son's girlfriend sleep over just because it's too late for her to drive home. I was shocked when I found out, my jaw literally dropped. I keep thinking of the youngest son. Will he be able to bring girls home and have them sleep over to?
    Good for you for standing up for what's right, it's getting harder and harder to do so. You are such a Great mom, I'm so glad I have you to look up to. I want to be a mom like you.
    Tell Charlie how much fun it will be to have a sleep over with his cute wife, in the don't to distant future.

  2. I remember working with this girl 16 years ago who said her parents let her boyfried sleep over with her in her room all the time. She said they were responsible parents and it was better for them to do this in their home then in a car or elsewhere. I was like, "WHAT?" Of course, she was divorced, had a daughter, and now was having any man married or not sleeping over in her apartment (she said it is a wife's responsibility to keep her husband happy and if they didn't it wasn't her fault if she could provide them with some pleasure! Our nation needs to return to self control, parents such as you that teach morality, etc. You have to save the invitation in his memory box or files and someday he will be astounded and say, THANK YOU MOM!

  3. I totally agree with your decision!

  4. Oh my gosh. I obviously don't have kids old enough for this stuff yet. I am totally shocked. I noticed it was from a girl right away and was all like, "WHHAAA??" lol. I agree totally with you and think its easy to say no to that because that's just craziness. Also, in response to earlier comments I totally remember the parents in high school who would host drinking parties because they were responsible and wanted to keep the kids safe. Again, WWHHHAA?? People are crazy I tell ya, crazy. But that's what I think.

  5. WHAT!!! As far as I know aside from the fact that it is pure craziness for the parent to allow the kid to have co-ed sleep over, the kid would have to be crazy to want that. I mean the kids my age find it akward to even sit by each other until the teachers have nthem do that long enough to get used to it. But then again people are already kissing and dating so I don't knowd if the kid would want a co-ed sleep over or not. Most likely yes.

  6. I have not encountered this and OMGosh I would be shocked if I did so! It's ridiculous and totally unacceptable!!
    This is just one part of where society and parents have gone wrong!!
    We need to be PARENTS not friends, those parents will need to sleep at some point and who knows what would/could happen.. 3rd grade or 1st grade they are still boy/girl and curious......
    Amy did you ever read that book "why gender matters"??

  7. I'm not sure my kids will ever spend the night at anyfriend's houses.....certainly never with the opposite gender. I had no idea that was a even an option.


    -Stuck in the MUD

  8. i'm with you girl! how weird. i haven't heard of this, so i'm a little weirded out!! i would never even consider inviting a boy to sleep over for my daughters 9th birthday (which is this sunday btw) and, more than that? i don't think she would even want to have a boy over....

  9. Holy COW, I've never heard of that! I can't believe the parent's were okay with that!! I am shocked. Seriously. I'm still amazed. Seriously, holy cow. I don't know what else to say! Seriously. ;-)


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