When you can't sleep

Jeff and I have had some things are our collective married mind lately. Nothing serious, but just decisions that need to be made about buying a house, staying in the country or moving closer to town.

We have talked round and round about it. We have a couple of options, one of which I can't talk about  because it involves other people and no final decisions have been made. 

But after a lot of discussion we felt like we had decided what direction we wanted to go. 

And then we couldn't sleep. 

Midnight came and went and still no sleep for either of us. Most likely because once our minds were pretty made up, all that it would mean kept circulating in our heads-possibilities, logistics and such.

Finally at 12:30 we decided sleep was not coming and so we went on a drive and get cookies. From McDonalds.

I know, I know. But there is not much open in a town like Ellensburg past midnight

So we got our cookies, and drove around for a while. Long enough to feel settled and able to go home and sleep. 

But it was fun while it lasted.

At 8:30 last night I could have easily fallen asleep, I was so tired. But I had to get kids to bed. Why is it, even when we are so tired, that pressing matters keep our minds buzzing? I don't know the answer but I do know I am grateful to have someone that I am happy to stay up all night with:)

Life continues to be an adventure.

Nora turns 6

First of all, I will be really excited when we get our camera fixed. My phone just does not take the same quality and speed of photos.  But, at least I have it, right? 

So in July, a day came that I can hardly believe. And I will say that for every birthday for the rest of her life.

Nora turned 6. 

I don't know how to describe how that makes me feel. I look at her and I still see the tiny baby wrapped in a pink blanket six years ago.

So it is hard to fathom how six years could have gone by so quickly, so delightfully, full of so much joy and blond hair bouncing and belly laughs. 

I have written before about Nora joining our family here. She was meant to be in our family.

Every day is so fun with her and I know we all love her to death and can't imagine our lives without her.

I think being the youngest child would have some definite perks. While yes, mommy and daddy are a little more tired than when Kate was 6, we are also more patient and know that a lot of things aren't that big of a deal. 

And she has 5 older siblings who adore her. The girls dote on her more than the boys. Charlie likes to argue with her. It's hilarious. I am always asking him why a 12 year old boy would argue with his 6 year old sister. He has no answer for me. It just is.

Nora and Henry are best buds. They are only 22 months apart so they don't remember life without each other.

Anne Marie is the fun, creative older sister who also goes RUNNING to comfort whenever Nora makes the slightest inclination that she is hurt or bothered in any way. 

And then Kate and Julia are the other mothers to her. Old enough to remember her as a tiny baby, to have changed her diaper and enamored by her. Even if they do think she is a bit spoiled;) 

See? Lucky little girl.

But she makes it so easy to love her. She smiles and laughs easily. She is so grateful for anything you do for her. She apologizes easily to others and she loves to help and seems to be very good at helping others feel happy. 

And it is so fun to give her presents!

This was the year for a Frozen party. She loves the movie as does every other girl in the world. So you would think finding Frozen themed party decor would be easy, right? No way. We had to hunt. But we succeeded and she was a happy little girl.

I love my family. And I am grateful daily for each and every one of my children. It is a privilege and a joy to be their mother. 

10 reasons we love Nora

1. She loves to snuggle. She will ask me to read to her and snuggle on my bed at night. How can I say no? I can't.

2. She is sweet and kind but when she gets mad she finds somewhere deep down that comes exploding out. It doesn't happen very often, but woo hee is it something!

3. Her siblings are her best friends. She loves spending time with all of them.

4. She will help whenever I ask. They all do at this age, but I still love it for as long as it lasts.

5. She seems to innately know when someone needs her to rub their arm or tell them she loves them, or if we need a hug. It's pretty adorable.

6. She will try almost anything I make for dinner. Since we have been vegan it's a little tougher for her, but she really does try.

7. Her smile is infectious. It lights up a room and her dimples need to be kissed!

8. She has always been easy to put to bed. She never went through the phase of coming out a million times. 95 percent of the time, when I put her to bed, she stays there.

9. She tells the truth. Its not easy for her all the time, but she wants to do the right thing.

10. She simply has us all wrapped around her finger. Especially me, I admit. There is something about her that makes a person warm and fuzzy on the inside when you are around her. It's one of her gifts. And it's a good one.

Happy Birthday darling Nora!

We have a young man in our house

This last March, (Yes, I am REALLY behind), my darling first son, the one who could not be in my presence without being smothered with kisses, the one who had more energy and determination than any child I have ever known, turned 12.

He has grown up so much. In fact, he didn't want presents, just money so that he could buy whatever he wanted. Not surprisingly, he was very generous with his birthday money and with the money he had earned from his paper route. "I'll buy pizza for everyone Mom." "If we go to the store, I will buy everyone candy."

It's usually food he offers;) But I have a theory about people who are generous with their money-they always have it. They get what they give. And it's true with Charlie, he always seems to have money.

In April, instead of going to the San Juan Islands with his 6th grade class, he chose to spend 2 days camping with his dad. So Jeff took off from work and they headed out, just the two of them.

Charlie is a remarkable boy. He has an ability to memorize entire bits from Jim Gaffigan and Brian Regan. He never loses anything. Seriously. He always knows where everything he owns is. And he is not messy. His room has always been the easiest to clean. He had a girl at school ask him to be boyfriend/girlfriend with him. He told her that he liked her but that he couldn't date til he was 16. She said, "Well, your parents don't have to know." And he let her know that we weren't the only reason he wouldn't do it. And then he came home and told me, cuz he tells me everything.

 He also really hates swearing. Like, really, really hates it. At the beginning of last year, some kids asked him to sit with them at lunch. He liked them, but they swore a lot. He asked them not to. They tried, but couldn't seem to do it. So he went and sat somewhere else. And when one of them came to ask him why he wasn't sitting with them, he told them honestly, "You swear too much."

I was amazed  that he was confident enough, as a brand new sixth grader, to tell a 7th grade boy the truth like that. And he didn't give a second thought to it.

He is working towards his Eagle Scout award. I forget how far he is, cuz I was never a scout, but he is right on course. We are really proud of him for it and grateful that he is so focused and truly loves doing the right thing.

Charlie is also amazing to his sisters. He has his very normal older brother moments, but even those are mild. And if anyone else were to say or do anything rude to one of his sisters? He would not hesitate to defend them. Kate and Charlie especially have a bond. Maybe it's because she is the oldest so the distance is far enough that she CAN tell him what to do. But he will let her kiss him and hug him and half the time I am telling those two to calm down;)

He is simply an awesome, good, kind, righteous young man who loves his family and who is a supreme goofball. But how else could anyone survive in this family without a bit of quirkiness:

We love you Charlie!

Organize lovely-A bulletin board for our crazy, beautiful life.

That is a name of one of my Pinterest boards. I call it organize lovely because other than functioning better, organizing should allow your space to be lovely. Right? Organized=Lovely. The end.

So this last year with 6 children in school, I found that I always had a pile of papers that had to be signed, looked at, returned, what have you. It was annoying. Especially because I hate piles and clutter. But alas it was never ending.

So this summer, when those papers weren't coming home, I happily looked at the clean counter and thought, "Never more. I will not have piles of papers!"

So I had to come up with a solution.

In our entry way we have this adorable little desk. It had snazzy little mirrors above it, creating a nice decorated little space that did absolutely nothing but look good.

We never sat there except for the occasional playing school, and it was just a constant hot spot where people unloaded papers and odds and ends. I don't have a picture of it. Which is sad, cuz when clean it was cute. But again, without function or purpose.

I knew that it would be a perfect command center if I could find just the right way to organize it while still making it lovely enough to be one of the first things people see when they come in our home.

And since my budget was, as always, about 20 bucks I searched around until I found this handy little tutorial for a bulletin board using foam insulation board instead of cork board. You can buy a huge piece that weighs about a pound at Lowes or Home Depot for 8 dollars. You can cut it yourself with a utility knife, or you can nicely ask the guy helping you to do it. Your choice. I chose getting help:)

I chose a size of 40 inches wide and 45 inches high. It fit the area and gave me plenty of space to organize our lives.

I then chose a piece of fabric that was sturdy enough to recover when a thumb tack was removed, without being too heavy to actually push through the fabric. Make sense?

From there I just followed her instructions and it turned out great.

I also love the look of nail heads/upholstery tacks but I like not spending very much money. So I bought a package each of silver and white tacks and spent the good part of an hour tacking them around the entire perimeter.

I found awesome mini clothes pins and gold clothes pins at Walmart and hot glued them to the fabric.

                                        Dollar buckets from Target always come in handy.

I bought a great desk sized calendar for the whole family's activities, which even with just about one per person, it really adds up! Now we can all check the calendar and see whats what. 

It makes me happy every time I sit there. It's kind of become my space and it seems everyone innately knows not to put ANYTHING on that desk because I have not had to remind anyone-I think my "reminders" are what they are really afraid of. ;) 

Also, I love birds. Sorry. I do. And though it has nothing to do with this post, I possess a high number of bird type decor in my house. It's been that way for years now. I've been thinking about branching out into other creatures, maybe a fox or two, but I just can't seem to do it. 

And I believe that as a reward for my love of feathered friends, a mama robin decided to build her nest on one of the beams of our front porch.

The babies have grown up and gone now, but we felt honored that a little piece of our home made her feel safe to have her babies.

Also, did you know that a robin will totally abandon her nest when you open your front door? She will fly off to the safety and distance of the front lawn and leave her eggs undefended, screeching at you the whole time, but from afar.

I was surprised by that. If I was a mama bird and someone came near my nest? Well, lets just say there would be no long distance screeching.

It's nice to be back by the way. I forgot how much I loved to blog. And oh, there is so much to tell and play "catch up" with. See you soon.

Starting Over

This last year was good and wonderful, but also rough and difficult. Aren't most years like that?

We moved and with that came making new friends, dealing with new things and coming together as a family.

Experiencing last year makes us all excited for this year to start, to feel fresh and new and bright with new opportunities.

Being mindful of that, Jeff and I talked a  lot about happiness, where it comes from, how to keep happiness flowing in our lives. And the answer we came up with is gratitude. Being grateful, despite our circumstances, despite our challenges, brings a light into our lives that helps crowd out the dark and illuminate our paths.

I read a talk by Elder Uchtdorf of the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and the title jumped out at me since Jeff and I had been talking about this very thing:  Grateful in Any Circumstance

And we decided to make it this year's Family Theme for the new school year. I presented it at last night's back to school feast. Which was pizza, cuz we are obsessed with it lately. And our treat was apple juice with dinner since we have cut treats to only once a week. Usually.

As a family we watched part of Pres. Uchtdorf's talk and then we talked about gratitude, how we get out of life what we expect. Everyone shared things they are grateful for and we made a plan to discuss, every night at dinner, what we were grateful for that day. 

Then each child received one of these for their locker, and we hung one up on the bulletin board. (That I made! and will post about later)

(That picture of Jeff and I was taken at our luncheon right after we got married in the Seattle Temple. Yes, I know we look like babies. *sigh*)

Then of course after our talk about gratitude, we were blessed with a seriously amazing, full double rainbow. 

It gave me a little thrill to see it. 

Then this morning came, all too soon. Good bye to summer, hello to routine and quiet days and a clean house;)

First day of school pictures are a must. But I refuse to have them hold a sign. I don't know why. 

AndI am not a bit biased when I say that my children are the most beautiful on the planet. 

 Side note, Henry has the HARDEST time just smiling for a photo. He always has to look silly. But this one made the cut cuz Jeff had just told him to smile like he would at a girl he wanted to kiss. Girls are still icky apparently.

  This last one was silly just for Henry. It was the only way I could get him to smile, sort of, for the first.

 This year is going to be good. Jeff has a part time job teaching at the local University so extra money will make things easier. We are all choosing to be grateful, which means there is always a silver lining. I have learned how to manage the depression that was pretty debilitating this last year, hence my lack of posts and the topic for a future post-which means its easier to get out of bed. And life in general is just fantastic. Not perfect by any means, but fantastic.

And I have learned, that just as with decorating, life does not have to be perfect to be beautiful!

Skipping school

Last Friday Nora woke up and let me know, in no uncertain terms, that she did not want to go to school.

So I didn't make her.

Now you might think that I gave in too easily. But. Nora never wants to stay home. Never.
And for a little girl who never went to preschool and barely turned 5 before starting all day kindergarten, that is saying something.

So the two times she has asked to stay home, I have let her. She obviously knows when she needs a little break.

However, I had planned to go hiking so I told her she was welcome to come hiking with me, or go to school if hiking didn't sound fun.

She chose hiking.

But then I had a dilemma. How could I offer Nora this and not Henry and Anne Marie?

Well, they chose hiking too.

I was nervous because it is a 5 mile round trip. Anne Marie has done it but Henry and Nora have only hiked about 3 miles at once.

I told them ahead of time that if they complained at all, we would turn around and go back to school.

Well it is AMAZING how much better something is, especially when it is difficult, when you DON'T COMPLAIN. All of a sudden, when you focus on doing something instead of complaining about it, it becomes a much easier and more rewarding task.

And they didn't die. They talked and laughed. They had a great time. And most important, they made it.



They signed their sweet little names to the book at the top of Menastash ridge. And I was one proud mama.

The only downside. Henry did not want to go to school yesterday, or today for that matter. In fact he never wants to go. But now he says, "I will go hiking, or clean the house. But I am NOT going to school!"

He went.

I have to space out the skip days you see. But he doesn't have to hold out for long. 4 weeks left of school!

Yippee!

I am compiling a list of fun, mainly free activities that a mom and her kids can do together during the summer. And they are age range friendly. Meaning, it should be fun whether you are sixteen or 6.

Just no complaining.

For the beauty of the earth

Yesterday my aunt Cathy and I took a little journey down to the Columbia River.

The river is very low right now because of a crack in the dam a ways down.

This mean the bridge that goes over the Columbia River is more exposed and you can see the crossbeams underneath.

My aunt knew this from a friend and so she decided to drive over to see it. I also highly suspect it was to see her cute guy friend as well;)

But I got to go along for the ride. And she bought me McDonalds:)

As we stood looking out over the river, I was struck by how beautiful the state of Washington is. On the west coast you have rain forests and lush, green beauty everywhere you look.

Central Washington gives you rolling hills and checkerboard farmland.

And then Eastern Washington gives you vistas and dessert and the Columbia River.

I was so excited about my bursting love for the state of Washington that when I got home I wanted to tell Jeff all about how our state is the only one that has such diversity in it's type of beauty.

Um......

Until I started thinking about it. "Well, I guess Oregon has a great variety too. Oh, and I suppose people in California love the diversity of landscapes there as well. And I'm willing to bet that people in...."

You get the picture.

I love where I live. But really, this entire country is bursting with beauty, wonders and diverse climates and landscapes that bless the lives of those who live there. And I have seen it in the states we've actually lived in-Wisconsin, Utah, Washington and Rhode Island. And all the states we've traveled in between.

And I believe, fully, that all of this beauty was a gift from our Heavenly Father. He loves us so much that he thought of beautiful ways to enrich our lives. The beauty of the Earth is just one of them.

Have a blue sky, sunshine filled day!

Puttin down roots.

I made bread yesterday. Which I do.

In order to try and get my loaves to be equal, I decided to weigh them. I have never done this before. I usually just eye it, and the results, admittedly, are mixed.

However, I don't own a kitchen scale.

Then I remembered that I have my great-grandmother's kitchen scales. I have just had them as precious, memory filled decor. But she actually used them.

So I grabbed one, and yes indeed, they still weigh stuff just fine.




My loaves turned out even and my heart and mind were turned to my great-grandma.

I imagined that she was very pleased to see her great-granddaughter using in her kitchen, something that she, Anna Mohar, used regularly.

Just as I use my grandma's butter dish, and store my own lovelies in her hutch, it seems to me more and more, that while antiques that we look at are neat and all, antiques that we still use is what our ancestors would have really wanted.

I imagine that my g-grandma would not understand the extraneous, decor only type things around my house.

If it was in her home, it was because she used it.

I had a unique experience with my g-grandma compared to most people.

My grandma and grandpa built their house across the field from her.

My mom worked, so every day in the summer until I was in middle school, and most saturdays we spent with my grandma.

This meant that in addition to seeing grandma, we would also walk across the field and play at my great grandma's house, visit her, walk through her flower garden, eat the raspberries growing and not have any clue how enchanted our life really was.

So I knew my Grandma Mohar. Really knew her. Besides the consistent summer visits, during school my mom would go and see her regularly and she always took us with her. My great grandma had an oil stove in her living room that was always soooo warm. My sister and I would lay down in front of it and the heat would make us sleepy and before long, we would be out.

Who knows, maybe my mom just took us their to get us to nap:)

All I know is that most children do not have the experience with great grandparents that I did. Of all her grandchildren and great grandchildren, we were the only ones who still lived in Cle Elum and so we were blessed to see her on a regular basis.

Its funny, I use to not be able to wait until I could grow up and move away. But looking back now, I am so grateful for the life I was blessed with. For the heritage and stories that were minutes away from me.

And I am grateful to have been given a few things from both my grandma and my great grandma that help me still feel connected to them even though they are both gone now.

Now that we are back in  the Kittitas Valley, I feel such a connection somewhere deep in  my soul. I don't know how to explain it other than it must be the generations of my family that have been here since the 1890's.

I drive on the freeway and see the remains of my great-great uncle Linn's homestead. ( My middle name is from him)

I drive on a back road and know that the little canyon was named after my family.

I drive by my great grandmother's house on the road that still bears the family name.

I look around and know that I am seeing the same mountains and hills that they saw. Albeit different now 120 years later.

I wonder about their journeys to settle here. About the hardships they endured to start somewhere new, to grow things, including their families, in this new and unsettled place. What amazingly strong people they must have been.

And I am still connected to them. Which makes me wonder, as much as we have moved around, how can I ever leave?

Christmas is over:(

How was your Christmas break?

Ours was good. Uneventful. Full of sleeping, eating and movie watching. 

The kid went back yesterday and I am once again, alone. *sob*

Okaay. Not really. Jeff works from home 3 days a week. But he is really quiet! I like a little noise in my life. 

Oh, and Anne Marie is home with the stomach flu. Did I say alone? Not alone really, as much as bored without all of them home with me. Y'all know, I've never been one to wish them back at school. Ever. 

So here is our break in a few pictures. They are all from my phone because our good camera is broken. And since I am  broke ;) I don't know when it will be fixed. 

We slept a lot. I know she is five. But since she is also my baby, she will be cute sleeping forever. FOREVER!

We went to a church party and every got to sit on Santa's lap.

And no, I did NOT make the older kids sit with Santa. Why do you ask?

I got to go to the Christmas program for the Damman school.

Nora's class. Yes that is all of them.

Henry's class. Also all of them.

And Anne Marie's class. No one was sick that day. 

We love their little school. They have made some friends and we love the way it feels like a family.

They were going to the largest elementary school in Washington state. So it's been a change. But a really good one. Life feels so much more relaxed for us.

And that is always a good thing. Now I'm off to prepare for Jeff's birthday. He is 39. Finally as old as me;)

Poetry Out Loud

Just a shout out to my girl Julia who placed in the top 8 for Poetry Out Loud.

She will be moving on to the finals for her high school on January 15th.

If she places in the top 2 there, she goes on to regionals, then state, then nationals.

She writes really great poetry, but the kids recited poems from a set list. It was really neat to watch everyone.

Its the first time I've ever seen her nervous. But she did great. The only thing I was disappointed about what that we clapped instead of snapped our fingers. I wore my turtleneck and beret for nothing!

My girls are so glad that I can say I am only kidding about what I wore;)

Why I am the Grinch

Yesterday on our way home after school we saw an awesome sight.




It was Santa! Driving around Ellensburg in his red Miata, with a load of presents in the back seat and his sleigh car all lit up.

I got all excited and said, "Lets get closer and wave!"

We followed him into the Goodwill parking lot, rolled down the windows and all yelled, "Hi Santa!"

At which point he gestured for my kids to come over to him. I wish I had the presence of mind to have my phone out and take a picture, but I didn't.

My littlest 3 got out, with Charlie as chaperone, and went to see him. And much to our wondering eyes he took 3 of the presents, (which I had assumed were just decorations) and handed them to my little kids.

Just as he did with the next little kids he saw.






It was so awesome to see someone so full of the Christmas spirit that he would dress up, travel around Ellensburg in the 14 degree weather, and deliver toys to children.

We were so excited, it was so wonderful. And then I heard the children talking about opening them when they got home.

To which I replied, "Oh, you have to wait for Christmas day. It's a Christmas present."

And then, all heck broke loose.

"What?!!! Why?!!!" and much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

To which, honestly, I probably should have just said fine.

But sometimes, as soon as I hear whining, and arguments, I dig in. I get stubborn and decide that it is more important for me to be right than for me to preserve what was a great moment.

But I didn't do that.

I argued that it was a Christmas present, so we should wait for Christmas. I told them they were being greedy and ungrateful. Yeah, it was a good solid parenting moment:(

They countered back that it wasn't given to them on Christmas, so they should be able to open  it.

Pretty soon I was hearing that I was the worst mom ever, that I was the meanest mom ever.(True at that moment) And my older son was in agreement with them, which meant he unleashed all of his argumentative powers,( which are not small), on me.

Needless to say, it was awful.

Once we got home, someone threw their wrapped present at my face.

I reacted by behaving just as badly.

They all went in crying. I locked myself in my closet to complain to Jeff who said, "I'm sorry. That's awful. I probably would have just let them open it. "

Yeah.

I came out of my closet just to be assailed again. So I got in my car, drove around and cried and cried.

I came home and told them I didn't care if they opened them. The moment was over and ruined whether they opened it at that moment or on Christmas.

The awesome, giving gesture of that man was completely lost on me, and because of my behavior, it was lost on my children.

I was sad the rest of the evening. My 10 year old daughter was sad the rest of the evening.

Henry and Nora were fine as soon as I told them they could open their gifts.

The lesson I learned was that there are a lot of times where things are just not a big deal.

I would have loved if my kids had responded with, "Of course mom. We will wait til Christmas."

But they didn't, and I was being unreasonable to expect them to always act the way I want them to or think they should.

They were happy and excited and I stole the moment.

Aren't you glad I share these things so that you can say to yourself, "At least I didn't do THAT."

Being a parent. *sigh*

But to quote my favorite literary heroine, Anne Shirley, "Isn't it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day, with no mistakes in it yet?"

Yes that is nice. But I do think it would be nice if yesterday could be rewritten from time to time as well:)